I don’t have a secure sense of me. My concept of me depends on my perception of how others perceive me. I get inflated or deflated depending on the amount of air the world inflates into my ego balloon. I am biased to perceive the most recent and most negative feedback as the most potent. My relationship with the self is thus ever changing, as is my relationship with others.
This dynamicity makes life interesting, but is tremendously energy sapping. The tiny sapling of connection that I develop after each exchange is rapidly devoured by the grazing cattle of negative perceptions. I am thus unable to form strong roots that could feed the stem, branches and leaves of a community around me. In this state, my life becomes barren and lonely.
I need to shed the habit of constant relationship reevaluation. My relationships shouldn’t be anchored in perceptions, flimsy and superficial as they often are. I should anchor my connections on meaning.
The meaning of collective gains or success, can unite us. But such meaning is vulnerable, because the much sought after gains that defined me yesterday, stop being meaningful once acquired. The gains can also be lost in the blink of an eye. The one secure meaning that can bring us all together, which will never pale is the collective meaning of decreasing suffering.
You and I can join in an effort to minimize suffering and maximize happiness for our planet’s children. Relationships developed to serve such a meaning will be invulnerable to minor disagreements and negative perceptions.
Let’s join in to serve the common goal of eradicating suffering. Therein is the hope of us working and walking together the entire life.
Working against the same threat binds us. Let us find the common threat as collective human suffering.